Poems and Jokes

I hope this doesn't cause offense and only amusement!

AGILITY

Up and over, round and through

Agility is good for you

Teach your dog to jump and weave

The tunnels too, can be acheived

The front cross, rear cross, wait and go

Are handling methods you will know

It's with Wight Wizards you can train,

To get you fit and use your brain

So come along and have a try

Your dog will love it, don't be shy

The A-frame, Dog walk, see-saw too

Are contacts that you'll need to do

It's Cathy that you need to ring

So she can try and fit you in

She needs to check she has the room

So call us now we'll see you soon!!

By Cathy Humphries

 

Well the dogs they held a meeting and they came from near and far,
Some they came by aeroplane and some by motor car.
Outside the village hall they all did stop and look,
And each one took his ar*ehole off, and hung it on a hook.

In they went, all in a pack, every mother, son and sire,
Hardly were they seated when some bugger shouted, "Fire"
Out they came all in a rush, they had no time to look,
And each one grabbed an ar*ehole off of anybody's hook.

They got their ar*eholes all mixed up, which made them very sore,
To think they hadn't got the one that they had had before.
And that's the reason why a dog will always leave a bone,
To go and smell another dogs' ar*e, to see if it's his own!!!!

 Unknown

 

There was a young wizard called Ollie

 Who desperately wanted a Collie

He thought she'd be faster

But what a disaster

He ended up looking a Wally!!

By Maggie

 

A young Collie wizard called Abbs

Thought everyone's limbs were for grabs

But with time, not to mention

Cath's love and attention

She ended up being just fabs!!

By Maggie

 

WHAT DO YOU CALL..................................

A male Wight Wizard? Chappie

A well bred, friendly Wight Wizard? Pedigree Chum

An adored Wight Wizard? Well beloved

A friendly Wight Wizard? Pal

A rubbish Wight Wizard? Tripe

A horny Wight Wizard? Frolic

A successful Wight Wizard? Winalot

A Wight Wizard tale? Wagg

What do you give a naughty Wight Wizard? Schmackos

By Oliver

 

In a recent study a Wight Wizard dog was asked which dog food it preferred. After paws-sing for sometime it replied 'I don't know, you chews!!!'

At training one evening a dog looked positively embarrassed when faced with the A-frame. When questioned later the dog said it hadn't seen the A-frame for some time but tried to make contact!!!

 After Tinker returned from Spec Savers it was confirmed that indeed she did have tunnel vision!! 

If any of you folks have some poems or jokes you would like to add please either email them to me or give them to me at training.